Dear Becca & Grant,
                           Becca almost missed the bus yesterday. Monday it came at 7:10 and I mistakenly assumed that the bus comes at 7:10 or there about. Our original plan was to be outside waiting by 7:05 to give us a little cushion. I was helping Becca on with her shoes when I heard a diesel engine roaring down the road. I was praying that the garbage truck was just crazy early but no. I caught a glimpse of the bus and the number as it rumbled right on past the house. It was bus number 12, Becca's town bus. We had missed the bus and it was dear old Daddy's fault. Luckily I had chatted briefly with a woman across the street yesterday who has children get on the bus and she said that when we miss the bus we can go up to the corner and catch it there as she rounds the block. Grant's mom had him yesterday morning so I didn't need to worry about getting him out of bed so we headed straight up to the corner. Turns out that the kids across the street missed the bus as well so all the young'uns caught the bus on the corner of Colony & Southhill. The woman across the road told me that the bus was late yesterday and on time today so we'll have to be out there at five till or so from now on. She really didn't miss the bus to school but she came as close as humanly possible. We'll get our timing down before too long.
      Before Becca almost missed the bus she had Cocoa Puffs, half a mini bagel with whipped cream cheese, a banana and orange juice for breakfast. Well, to be honest she really didn't have all that because the only thing she ate was the cereal and a few sips of the juice. I made her take a bite of the bagel and eat at least a third of the banana. I usually don't make her eat but she needed a little more than just that sugary cereal for breakfast before school. She's already informed me that she wants Trix cereal for breakfast in the morning. I reckon I'll give her that with a clementine and maybe cut up a banana in her cereal so she will eat it. I worry about feeding her good healthy meals. I know the sugary cereal is not exactly good and healthy but I try to give her healthier stuff to go with it. It's just that she doesn't eat the healthy stuff. I suppose that after tomorrow the sugary cereals will be reserved for weekend breakfasts. From here on out it's going to be things like eggs cooked in olive oil with a bit of cheese, fruit and fruit juices, milk, grits, oatmeal, toast with fruit spread and maybe a piece of bacon or sausage every now and then.
      I plan on putting a pork roast with veggies in the crock pot later this morning so she can have a good hearty supper. All she had last night was a bowl of New England clam chowder, a few pickles and a good serving of canned fruit with a diet soda. She really liked the clam chowder. I was suspecting that she would because she does like stuff like that whereas I do not.
      Grant went to where his mom is staying Monday night. I had planned on dropping both children off at their mom's and going grocery shopping to give Becca and her mom a little extra time together. I bought some fried chicken, mashed potatoes, baked apples, biscuits and some mixed veggies to take to their mom's so they could all eat together. It seemed to all be going really great until it was time for Becca and I to leave. She didn't want to leave her mom. She screamed and cried for the longest time. I felt so bad for the little girl. Their mom and I have been separated for a little under a year and a half and divorced for about seven months and it still weighs heavily on poor Becca. I know it's cliché but it's also true that divorce and separation is always hardest on the children. Monday night was a nightmare. I know I did the right thing by hanging around so they could spend time together or did I? If it upsets Becca that bad, is it in fact the best thing to do? She needs to spend time with her mother and of course, her mother needs to spend time with her. I was just trying to be a good father and a respectful and generous ex-husband and ended up upsetting both Becca and her mom.
      Well, I reckon that's all for now. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
               It's Sunday afternoon early. I slept 12 to 13 hours last night. I didn't intend on staying in bed when I laid down at around six last night. It was supposed to be a nap and then I was gonna clean up the living room, watch television into the early morning and then finally hit the proverbial hay. It didn't work out that way. I must have been much more exhausted than I had assumed. If I was a Hollywood star I believe I'd be checking myself into a clinic for exhaustion but since I am just a regular guy with a regular job, a regular mortgage and regular kids that need to be regularly fed and clothed I just keep on doing the regular things that people do in those circumstances.
       I had a bad case of acid indigestion this morning, which I have been having a whole lot lately. I realized I'd left my Pepcid Complete at Mamaw & Papaw's. This was about eight this morning. I decided that the pain necessitated an antacid run. I went to Kroger and decided to do a little grocery shopping. I bought a ton of snack stuff for Becca to take to school and lots of healthy breakfast stuff for her to eat before she heads out the door in the morning. I'm laid off for the next two weeks so she will be getting on the bus here and coming back home here. It'll be kinda fun getting my little girl off to school for a few weeks.
       The young'uns are with their mom right now. I picked her up from her job yesterday at three and drove them all to where their mom is staying. I drove around awhile listening to my "History of Rome" podcast before I headed back to the house and even sat in the driveway listening to the final 15 minutes of the episode before I went into the house. That's when I crashed and shortly thereafter I decided to take what I thought was gonna be a quick nap. Ya know, I adore spending time with my kids but sometimes it's just nice to have some quiet time where I can occupy my time in adult activities and not have the kids arguing over whether we're gonna watch Spongebob or Barney.
      I should have probably went up to their mom's and taken them to church this morning but I really didn't want to this morning. We've missed two Sundays in a row now and I feel terrible about that. I'll make sure they get to church next week. I don't need to be missing church either.
      Yesterday afternoon the kids and I hung around the house and chilled. I fed them a lunch of mini hamburger patties (no bread) with A-1 steak sauce, California blend of veggies and Velveeta mac & cheese for lunch. It was kind of a late lunch so right after they ate we got dressed and left to get their mom. I stopped by Dairy Mart on the way to get us all a special treat. I knew it was a mistake even before I did it but I wanted one as well. I had seen on a television show a few days ago all about how they made those strawberry shortcake ice cream bars and it made me want one so the kids and I went and had us one as we drove to Lexington. Grant accidentally got some on his head and when Becca laughed at him he started using it as a comb. Here I was driving on Versailles Road while Grant is slathering himself with a strawberry shortcake ice cream bar. The little hellion looked like he had suffered a near fatal head wound with all of the sticky red ice cream matted in his hair and running down his face. I knew it was a mistake but we had so much fun that I wouldn't trade it for the world.
      As we waited on their mom to get finished with her work we listened to songs. Grant wanted the Campfire Song by Spongebob while Becca wanted Laurie Berkner songs. I had to switch back and forth from Spongebob to Laurie Berkner. Grant was not happy at all when it was not Spongebob. I kept telling him that it was Sissy's turn. Eventually he caught on because every time I played one of his sister's songs he hollered "my turn" all the way through the song.
      Well, there's not much to write about this afternoon so I will close this post out for the day. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Becca's First Day of Kindergarten

Dear Becca & Grant,
               Becca had a ball on her first day of real school, kindergarten. I know she did fabulous in preschool and I don't see any reason why she shouldn't repeat her performance in kindergarten. She seems to really enjoy the interaction with the other children. I just wish that she was more forthcoming about what she does at school. She just doesn't really want to talk about it much at all. She did open up quite a bit today regarding her first day but last year it was like pulling teeth to even get her to tell you what she had for lunch.
      She went to "Dylan's Night for MD" at McDonalds last night with her mom & Sherri, actually both children did. It wasn't as nice as it was last year or so I was told. Mainly the complaint was that the petting zoo and pony rides weren't there. Becca told me today that the ponies had eaten some poison hay and they had gotten sick and that if children rode on the ponies they would get sick too and that's why the ponies weren't there. Kristie wanted to keep Grant with her and I, of course had no problem with that and when Becca got back to my house she decided that she wanted to spend the night with her mom too so I let her. Their mom had them at the school already when I arrived to see Becca off on her first day of school. We went in and deposited Becca in the gym where she waited with her class to go to her room. She saw Ms. Dykes, her preschool teacher and rank up to her and gave her a big hug. Ms. Dykes commented on the fact that it's always sad when her students move on but she always has a new crop coming in. Mrs. Hisle, Becca's new teacher informed me that I had forgotten to include how Becca would be going home on her name tag in the afternoon. I felt rather sheepish as I told her I would be picking her up. At this point her mom and I went on and left. I would have liked to have seen her in her new classroom but all the other parents were leaving so we did too. My plan was to pick up the house some, mow the yard and take a nap before I went back to the school to get Becca as Grant was spending the day with his mom. I ended up watching Monk, Burn Notice and Eureka on television and suffering from my some of the most god awful indigestion I've ever experienced. I did make a quick trip to the gym though. I eventually headed back to the school to get my favorite daughter. I arrived a bit early and had to wait for them to open the doors. I went to the gym to get my girl and realized that I needed a pink pickup slip. I have no memory but I did vaguely recall hearing something about a pickup slip. I went back out to the office and got my slip and went and retrieved my little girl. Becca then informed me that I had forgotten to pack her a snack for the day. I felt very bad about that. I'll not forget again. I need to go get my background check done next week while I am off. There'll won't be any crowds and I just perform better when I'm not sure of what needs to be done if I don't have to contend with crowds.
      Becca and I then went to McDonalds for an ice cream cone to celebrate her first day of school. We went back to the house for about a half an hour while I took care of some business while Becca watched a little Spongebob. We then headed down to Mamaw & Papaw's for some after-school swimming. Becca was having a ball. She stayed in the pool more today than she had any other day this summer. I got her a light supper from my food stash I keep in Papaw's garage. She had cheese, apple sauce and pork & beans. Not exactly the healthiest of meals but she was more interested in swimming than eating. Eventually Jon came up with his friend Jed and Jed's sister, Jessie. Becca always has a great time when there's more than her in the pool. Lynn came up with her friend Kathy, Jed & Jessie's mom and they sat out by the pool and chatted. Eventually they left to get Jacob from football practice and I watched the young'uns while they were gone. Becca and Grant's mom came down with Grant, her sister, Aunt Mary and Desiray (I wonder if I'm spelling that right. It's been so long since I mentioned her). Desiray was very cute and super sweet. Grant got in the pool. As soon as he got his suit on he jumped right into the pool. He's doing that now. He jumped in probably forty to fifty times tonight. It's so awesome to see him take to water as much as his sister did. We put Desiray in a float and she had a ball too. Eventually Aunt Mary got in with the kids. Everyone had a fabulous time. It was getting kinda late, 8:30 and since it was a work/school night everyone got out. I bathed Grant down at Mamaw & Papaw's and the the kid's mom left with Aunt Mary and Desiray. I then bathed Becca and brushed her hair real nice. Becca decided she wanted to stay with Mamaw & Papaw and I allowed it and then she became undecided about who she wanted to stay with. I hate it when something like that upsets her so much. Anyway she stayed down in the country and Grant and I headed back to town. He went down without a problem.
      Grant's talking so much more, even more than a few days ago I think. There's really not a whole lot he can't say. He's even putting simple sentences together such as "This a-one", "Love you", "Have some" and probably more that I can't think of right now. I'm so proud of my little guy. He may be a regular hellion but he's my regular hellion. I put him down tonight and he told me that he loved me and as I was closing the door he told me bye-bye. My heart just melted.
       You may notice that this post is just a bit longer and formatted differently than a few of my previous posts. That's because the past half dozen posts or so was posted using my iPod Touch which I absolutely adore and this one is being posted using my laptop. Yep, I fixed the little bugger. Grant had spilled tea all over it and after a day or so of acting up it worked relatively fine with the exception of about a third of the keys on the keyboard and my wireless connectivity had gone out. I couldn't turn it back on and I had been hoping that the problem was a bad key. I decided to install a new keyboard and try that before I took it into a shop. I really needed a new keyboard anyway because Grant had pulled three commonly used keys off of it. I installed the keyboard and it's now working like a champ, plus it's a treat to be using a keyboard with tight fresh keys. I'm tickled pink. I was using the desktop and while it serves its purpose as a storage computer and a place for special programs it's not great for an everyday computer. My poor old ancient desktop has seen better days.
      Well, I didn't get a lot of sleep last night and I am dead dog tired so I will close out this post. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Idle Rambling

Just got back from picking up the young'uns from their mom's a couple of hours ago. We listened to Lauri Berkner, the lady who does the kid's songs on the way home. Speaking of home, when I asked Grant if he wanted to go home he said "Chuck E. Cheese".

Grant's asleep in his room and Becca's playing with sidewalk chalk in the driveway. I think I came up with a pretty clever game. I drew the alphabet and the numbers 1-10 in chalk on the driveway and I call out a letter or number she has to identify it and then she hops to it. She's kinda losing interest and her lollygagging and fiddle farting around is testing my patience. Here's where I need to just grin and be pleasant and remind myself that she's five years old.

I've been listening to a podcast called "The History of Rome" since I got this iPod touch. I am only able to listen to it while I alone in the car because I'm suspecting that the young'uns wouldn't be very interested in the history of ancient Rome and the military genious of Skippio Afrikanus, I could be wrong but I don't think so. We usually listen to kid's songs, tell each other jokes or just chat. I'm always tickled by some of the crazy imaginative things that Becca says and at the age is Grant is now anything he happens to say is liable to be new and as such is very exciting.

I weighed yesterday morning and weighed 158.8 pounds. I've been hanging around 160 for the past four or five weeks. I think I've lost enough anyway. Maybe even a little too much. Becca took a picture of me yesterday with my hair all messed up and I thought I looked like one of those chronic alcoholics in the middle of a week long bender.

I have so much stuff I need to do. I need to go back to school, I need to get back in the gym, I need to redo my personal budget and a hundred other things. Where do people find the time to do all the things that need to be done? That concludes the complaining and whining portion of this post.

Well, Becca's watching her nightly cartton before bed and it will soon be time to put her down and I need to start a load of laundry before I hit the proverbial hay so I will close this post out. Remember Daddy loves Becca & Grant!

Kindergarten Orientation and Chuck E. Cheese

Becca had her kindergarten orientation yesterday. We learned that her teacher will be Mrs. Hisle; I wonder if that's the correct spelling. Becca seemed to like her new teacher. She spent some time with her teacher and a number of her future classmates while I listened to a talk from the principal. She was super excited about her class when I got her after the thing was over. Two of her classmates she had last year in her pre-school class and she knew two of them from when she was in daycare a couple of years ago.

Allison accompanied us to the orientation thing. Allison and Becca met me at McDonalds where Allison bought Becca a chicken McNugget happy meal. Becca had barbeque sauce with her nuggets. Usually she has honey with her nuggets. I myself have always preferred the sweet & sour sauce, ever since they first introduced McNuggets 25 years or so ago. I got Becca some of that so she could try it. She liked the sweet & sour but still preferred barbeque. She did like the taste of her fries dipped in the sweet & sour though. I never get Grant any sauces because that's just asking for a mess.

After the kindergarten orientation I went to get Grant and we drove to Lexington where the kid's mom was entertaining her neice, Smurf and her kids at Chuck E. Cheese. Smurfs oldest, Arriana is just a month or so younger than Becca. I've mentioned her here in my blog before but it's been years since they've seen each other. They got along famously. Becca now wants to have a sleep over with Arriana; I don't know how that's gonna happen since Arriana lives in Hazard. Smurf's boy, Eric is three. I believe I've only seen him once when he was just an infant.

Anyway, Becca & Grant had a ball at Chuck E. Cheese. Grant absolutely loves that place. After Chuck E. Cheese we went with the kid's mom and her guests to IHOP for a super late supper. It was fun watching how well Becca and Arriana got along. They were holding hands and acting like bossom buddies. All the kids had happy face pancakes with squeezable yogurt and milk. I had two eggs over medium, two over cooked strips of bacon, hash browns, toast, milk and about a pot of coffee. Of course I didn't eat hardly anything at all and then ended up vomiting once I left the restaurant. IHOP used to be much better. The only reason I liked it in the first place was the fact that they had boysenberry syrup which they no longer have. IHOP really sucks. Give me Cracker Barrel any time. Speaking of Cracker Barrel, the brand new one in Nicholasville should be opening soon. I am so excited about that; I do love Cracker Barrel!

Okay, that's it for now. Daddy loves Becca & Grant!

Daddy's Root Canal

I'm kinda hurting right now. My tooth started hurting around about Friday. I made a dentist appointment Monday for today. I went out there and needed a root canal. This was my first root canal. The local anesthetic hasn't yet worn off all the way as of yet and it already kinda hurts. I hope it doesn't end up hurting as bad as the time I had a wisdom tooth yanked. That was one of the most painful experiences of my life. It shouldn't be that bad; Mamaw has had a bunch of them and she said they get kinda sore but I can handle that.

The young'uns spent a few days with their mom. I picked them up at the McDonalds over on Nicholasville Road, the one in front of Wal-Mart with the Playland. Grant was climbing up in the top just like he was a big boy. He loves McDonalds, not so much for the food which he never eats but for the playlands. All fast food joints are now known as "Donald's" and poor old Ronald McDonald is also known as Donald in Grant's world.

Becca has kindergarten orientation tomorrow. She finds out who her teacher will be and gets to meet her. She also gets a tour of the school she's been going to for the past two years of pre-school. I get to have a meet and greet with the teacher as well.

That's it for today. Daddy loves Grant and Becca!

Kindergarten Testing

Today Becca and I went to Southside Elementary for testing so that it could be determined where she is academically. I was pretty confident that she would blow them away with her keen mind and quick wit. Well, I was shocked that she recieved more negative marks than positive ones. She aced colors, rhyming, patterns and shapes but what I consider some of the most important areas, number recognition, counting, letter recognition, letter sound identification, writing her name and math basics were determined by the individual administering the test to be areas that need work. I blame myself for not working with her enough in those areas. It just seems that it's more fun for both of us if we work on things that she knows. Maybe I'm not patient enough with her when she doesn't know something. All along I assumed that she was just being stubborn about working with academics with me instead of her teachers. I remember it took her forever to count past five and that drove me to near insanity. The new five is thirteen. She doesn't seem to be able to get past thirteen. I always thought she was being stubborn but maybe she really doesn't know. She is a very smart child but maybe she's not the smartest of all. I need to work with her more and work on my own patience regarding what she does and doesn't know. I was just really taken aback by her poor showing. I am probably blowing this all out of proportion but I still need to work with her more and with more patience.

Speaking of academics I have been mulling over furthering my own education by seeking an undergraduate degree. I really need to find something I can do that o enjoy that will pay relatively decent. I called UK today and tomorrow I'll call the community college system.

Well, that's all I have for today. Daddy loves Becca & Grant!

Sunday Afternoon by the Pool

Last day before I have to go back to work. I got in the pool for only the second time during the entire duration of my time off. Grant and Becca both love it when I get in the pool and play with them but since I've lost so much weight from my surgery my internal thermostat has changed, ergo it's been just too flipping cold for me to be in the water.

I have been planning on taking Becca back to school shopping since about Wednesday but haven't gotten around to it. We'll probably go one day this week after I get off from work or I will take care of it myself if I can't work out a good plan. She already has a back pack that her mom gave her for her birthday and I ordered her a Ralph Lauren towel with her name monogramed on it from Neiman Marcus. It should be here before Friday. A towel is about all I can afford from Neiman Marcus. I priced some shirts there and they wanted as much as twoo hundred dollars for a t-shirt, a T-SHIRT! I'll go to Wal-mart and get one for five dollars and be just as well dressed. It's a t-shirt for crying out loud.

I fixed the young'uns a pretty good breakfast on the spur of the moment this morning. They has biscuits and gravy, scrambled eggs, grits with butter and sugar and cranberry juice cocktail as a beverage. I've noticed that since I can't eat any of my favorite foods myself I fix the children much more elaborate meals that I would enjoy if I could indeed eat. I also have this strange compulsion to watch my loved ones enjoying foods that I can't eat. Mamaw seems to think that I have some sort of mental defect because of that.

I have plans to get in touch with someone from UK to talk about taking some classes, online hopefully and about how I could go about paying for such a thing. I need to quit talking about it and just do it. I need to find a general number, call it and ask them who I need to talk to. I also need to figure out what I want to do for my next career. Do I want to do something with computers which would be potentially much more lucrative or do I want to pursue a career in education as a teacher. Maybe they have people out there who can advise me regarding that quandary. I don't think I'll be retiring from G.E. so I had better have another option in place when I need it. Well, we'll see how all of this works out.

I bought a Sunday paper before I headed down here to Mamaw and Papaw's and the young'uns have the sale papers spread out all over the pool deck. I've got some cleaning to do later.

I know it's been forever since I posted much so I haven't been able to mention how quickly I have blown through clothes as I have lost weight. I had to buy new jeans about every two weeks or so. I bought a pair of swim trunks early in the spring in a size that I hoped to be able to wear when it got warm enough to get in the pool but by the time it came to actually get in the water the swim trunks that I had hoped be able to squeeze into were kinda too big for me.

Mamaw is bringing some pizza down when she comes home from Lexington. The kids are getting hungry. We had some cheesecake bites earlier but I reckon they're hungry again. I wouldn't know about being hungry. I don't think I've really been hungry for six months. Becca just pointed out my throat and told me that that was where my "food cord" was. That's what she calls a neck. Just a funny little bit of info.

Well, I'm done with this post. Daddy loves Becca & Grant!

Tooth Ache

It's super early on a Sunday morning and I can't sleep because my tooth is killing me. I have a few shows on the dvr but I really don't want to watch television.

Becca went with Chris, Mikes's wife and her grand-daughter to Falling Springs yesterday to swim. Becca was barely big enough to go down the big slide but she loved it. Grant and I stayed at the house as I was suffering from this tooth ache.

We had three cheese hamburger helper with a can of mixed veggies thrown into the skillet, cottage cheese mixed with apple sauce, petite dill pickles, biscuits with garlic butter and cran-grape cocktail for supper last night. Becca had a buttered biscuit with blackberry preserves for dessert.

We then watched a bit of television. Grant only wants Barney and if it's anything but Barney he complains the whole time. It was a little easier before he picked up the English language. We rotated between iCarly which Becca likes and I find sort of amusing for a child's program and our one episode of Barney.

Grant went to bed easily which he does three quarters of the time and after a bit of whining and a token spanking Becca went down easier than usual. She really needs to get in bed much earlier since she will be having to roll out at the butt crack of dawn when she starts school in about ten days.

Okay, that's it for this morning. I have to go back to work Monday after two weeks off so I had probably take some kind of pain killer/sleeping pill so I can get to sleep. I'm gonna close this out. And as always, Daddy loves Becca and Grant!

Sitting by the pool

Well, I recently purchased an iPod Touch and I absolutely adore it. I am sitting out by the pool as Becca swims and Grant annoys me. I am using a blog post application for my Touch. It has wi-fi connectivity which I love. This is just a test of this app because Grant's threatening to throw Becca's shirt in the pool and I have to deal with him.

Dear Becca & Grant,
                  It's been almost six months since my last post. People had began to believe that I had given up on the blog. Well, not at all. I don't think I'm gonna keep up with the monthly pictures because I am so far behind it would be kind of silly or maybe I will start the monthly pictures back after birthdays. Becca's was earlier this month and Grant's is later next month. Well, we'll see.
      Okay a lot has happened in the past five months. I hate to admit this but the primary reason I didn't keep up with the blog was because I had an actual honest to goodness girlfriend there for a couple of months. It was my first ex-wife, Christy Hess from Florida. The tale there is long and maybe a little sordid so I'll just say that it didn't work out and leave it at that.
      Becca did get her first trip to the ocean as a result of me seeing Christy. Becca and I visited the Pensacola area of Florida and Becca got to go to Destin Beach. We had a great time collecting sea shells on the beach. The waves were kind of harsh that day and it ended up raining on us but we still had fun. Becca had more fun in the pool at the hotel though. Becca did absolutely fabulous during the drive as well. The drive usually took me about nine hours but with Becca it took more like twelve. I really enjoy driving though so it wasn't too bad. I enjoy driving but I hate stopping and with a then four year old stops become much more frequent than if I had been by my lonesome.
      Let's see, what have we done during my blog hiatus.Becca and I went to see a Disney on Ice show back in March. Just recently while I have been off work for vacation the kids and I went to the Explorium of Lexington and Becca and I went to The Newport Aquarium. We stopped at Cracker Barrel in Georgetown after the aquarium and had chicken and dumplings. Becca loves chicken & dumplings. Becca & I went to the Woodford County Fair twice again this year. Becca won a great big stuffed Spongebob by legitimately popping three balloons with a dart. She rode a few more intense rides than she did last year and absolutely loved it. It may seem that Grant is being left out of a lot of stuff but being a single dad it's hard to entertain a five year old while I have to wrangle a two year old. I'm gonna be laid off a whole lot this year so while Becca is in kindergarten Grant and I will be painting the town red.
      Oh yeah, Becca starts kindergarten in about two weeks. She's had two years of preschool in the building she will be going to so there will be no adjustment like a lot of kids will have to go through.
      It's been a super cool summer and when I say cool I'm not talking in slang. The temperature has been so that there's been many days that it's just been too frigid to get in the pool. Not as much swimming this summer as in the past. Grant is gonna be as good of a swimmer as Becca is already. At first he was kind of scared, or so I thought but I deduced that it was in fact too cold for him. He gets around in his floaty suit as well as Becca did at his age.
      Grant broke my laptop. He spilled tea on it. Either I'm gonna have to get it fixed or purchase another. I'm in the bedroom on the desktop right now. Grant is a one child wrecking crew.
      Okay, there's been a whole lot more to have happened but I don't recall what kinds of stuff that was. I've hit the high points I suppose. Becca had a nice birthday with a Spongebob Squarepants theme, her new favorite cartoon. I might do Grant's in Spongebob as well but if I can find Barney the Dinosaur, Grant's absolute favorite show, party stuff we'll do that but Barney isn't as popular as he once was.
      Okay, sitting in this chair is hurting my back. Oh by the way, I now weigh between 160 and 165 pounds. I had a lot of problems with an ulcer and still don't get in the proper amount of protein and I really need to hit the gym. But I've lost the weight I wanted to lose and I am 100% glad I had the surgery. Even with the problems I would do it again in a second.
      Well, I'm gonna close out now. I certainly hope I can post again before Christmas. Daddy loves Rebecca!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                     Mamaw told me that this blog was becoming the Danny Lanham Gastric Bypass Blog so I have kind of put off posting for awhile. The first week or so after my surgery I didn't get to see the kids as much as I would have liked because just being around them wore me out. I was recovering from surgery and really had a limited amount of stamina. The past few days I have spent a lot of time with my young'uns. Grant is still a pistol. He's picking up more and more words every day. In addition to all the ones he has been saying for quite awhile, Mama, Daddy, Sissy, Mamaw, Papaw, Sadie, No, bottle and such, he has added some other words to his vocabulary such as light, water, socks, banana, nose, ear, eye and he especially loves the word "Moo". Papaw got him doing it when he asked how a cow goes. Now Grant does it all the time. One day last week Grant heard Papaw on the other end of the phone line and instead of saying "hey" like he usually does he let out a big MOO. It was so cute. Grant loves Papaw.
      For Valentines I got Grant some sippy cups for Mamaw & Papaw's and for Becca I got her some new tiny earrings that I prefer over the bigger ones and a Disney Princess T-shirt that lights up. They are the only people I bought for this year though. This time off is really cutting into my budget. I absolutely have to get a membership to a gym and the one that I think I would use more is not much more expensive than the dinky one but the pay structure is set up so that I would have to pay more than twice what I would for the dinky one. I'll figure it out. I have to go to the gym or I will lose muscle mass and I certainly can't afford that.
      I go back to work in the morning and I am kind of apprehensive about that because I still get tired pretty easily. I am still only eating maybe once a day and even then it's not as much as Grant eats during a meal when he's not even hungry. The past two days I haven't gotten in as much protein and fluids as I should have and I haven't been walking nearly as much as I need to. Maybe getting back to work will help me get into a routine so that managing my new digestive system will be easier. I think it's getting harder to eat and drink now than it was a week ago. One little sip seems to fill me up and I hate that. I love water but I can't put it away like I once could.
      The first week I lost eleven pounds and the second week I lost just a hair shy of five pounds so in the two weeks since my surgery I have lost sixteen pounds which is pretty good. It's not as much as some that I have read but the guys that lose thirty pounds in the first two weeks are usually guys who have 200 to 300 pounds to lose and when I went under the knife I only had 82 pounds to lose to get to my personal goal and 66 to get to the goal set up for me by the bariatric center. Therefore being as how I don't need to lose all that much weight anyway the pounds will come off slower but I will be more apt to reach my goals if I follow the rules and quit stealing french fries off of Grant's plate. I do need to put the scales up in the closet so I am not tempted to step on them every time I go into the bathroom. I have had a bad habit of that the past few weeks. I didn't think I was going to lose anything the second week because the scales never seemed to change. It drove me bonkers.
      Well, I have had a full day and I am worn out like you wouldn't believe so I am going to go take a shower and hit the proverbial hay. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                  I'm home from the hospital. Just yesterday morning my stomach was whole and a huge reservoir for all kinds of foods that weren't good for me at all. I still haven't had a bite to eat since Tuesday evening but right now I have absolutely no desire to eat. My stomach hurts so much. Oops, I just took a small gulp of water out of habit. I wonder if that will end up hurting me more than I would like and I would wish it wouldn't at all. I feel better than I did yesterday though. I absolutely hate waking up from general anaesthesia. It seems like it takes days for my head to clear and for me to be able to think without any degree of confusion. I'm still in pretty intense pain from the procedure. I was told that if I walk while during my recovery it will lesson the pain so I walked the halls like I really had someplace to go. There was a woman walking the halls around the same times I was. When the pain medicine was working at full power I could almost walk the halls at a normal pace and that poor woman must have been in a whole lot more pain than I was because every time I would lap her she would jokingly tell me that she hated me. I do think that gulp hurt me a bit or it could be from the fact that I am testing out my ability to drink water while simultaneously dipping.
      I have had a 20 oz. water, a cup of tea, a cup of coffee, a cup of Crystal Light, some beef broth and the odd sip here and there. Tomorrow I will start measuring my fluid intake with more accuracy. I really need to be very conscientious regarding the water intake. It's one of the most important concerns relating to Gastric Bypass and weight loss. I want to do everything by the book so I can lose the absolute maximum amount of weight in the smallest time frame while still maintaining what puny amounts of muscle mass I already have. Papaw & Uncle Donny are going to be bringing the treadmill up here tomorrow if there's no more snow or other precipitation. I won't be able to jump on there and do an hour like I had done before the surgery but I need to get at least a half an hour in even it's in small intervals. Doctor Steiner, my surgeon told me that maybe Monday or Tuesday I could move on to the pureed stage of eating but if I don't feel any better than this I won't be making the transition until later. I'm sure I will be feeling better by then or at least I hope so. I thought I was ready for this but I underestimated the pain by about four fold. I would still do it but I would have been a bit more nervous about it. I wasn't nervous at all; just excited and I still am excited. I can't wait until the weight starts falling, the loss becomes noticeable and I especially can't wait until I am blowing through smaller and smaller sized clothes.
      Becca and Grant both came to visit me while I was in the hospital. I was surprised that Becca came because she had all along insisted that she didn't want to come to the hospital and see me all cut open. I understood where she was coming from and I was touched that she didn't want to see me in pain but I guess the little brat loves me so much that she just couldn't stay away. The kids brought me a big tall sippy cup and a pillow to hold against my chest when I coughed. Kristie and her friend, Sherri came by as well and brought donuts and coffee for everyone but me because I couldn't have any. Of course at that time and right now for that matter I didn't want to have anything to do with donuts and coffee.
      To tell you the truth I wasn't all that impressed with St. Joseph East as far as being a patient on the floor. I had a number of good nurses and aides but in the short time that I was there I had an equally number of rude and forgetful nurses and aides. I had asked the surgeon if I could have a nicotine patch to help fight the cravings that I would be having for my smokeless tobacco but I didn't get the patch until about two hours before I left. I was in such exquisite pain throughout my stay that I really didn't have any urges for nicotine. All I wanted was morphine and the antinausea medicine I had to take with the morphine. I don't know why they didn't bring them together. I would take the morphine and as quickly as the pain would subside the nausea would come on and I would have to buzz for the nurse. The floors where filthy and Mamaw & Papaw said that the cafeteria was just gross. Papaw said it looked like the break room up at General Electric and that is pretty nasty.
      After we left the hospital today I needed to get a bunch of prescriptions filled, I needed a roll of Grizzly Snuff and the 2008 TurboTax because I am ready to file. I had this bright idea that it would be good for me to get out and go inside Wal-Mart and walk around some. That was a mistake. It had been quite awhile since my last pain meds and I hurt incredibly bad. I found the TurboTax but the pharmacy was closed for lunch and they were out of Grizzly Snuff so we came on back to Versailles. Papaw dropped Mamaw off at Kroger so she could fill my prescriptions and then he took me to the discount tobacco store in Versailles. I got a roll of ten through the drive-thru and as I was making my transaction Mamaw called and told Papaw that there was an hour wait for my meds so he just took me on home. I waited for what seemed like forever for my pain medicine and I was never so glad to see Mamaw & Papaw as I was when they walked in carrying my percocets. I took one right away and I think I'm gonna take another one here in just a minute or so.
      I filled out my taxes using TurboTax and electronically submitted them so my taxes are filed or the Federal taxes are anyway. I owe to the state so I am just going to wait until I get my federal return to mail my state taxes. I claimed Becca this year but not Grant because Kristie will be claiming Grant until I can no longer claim Becca and then we will rotate claiming Grant. The loss of the deduction and filing as head of household killed me tax wise and I had to file single on the state taxes because head of household is not an option. I have to give my entire return to Mamaw & Papaw for taxes and insurance on this house minus the state taxes that I owe and I'll ask them if I can get me a new pair of shoes out of it as well. I really need new shoes. I can't wait until I'm fretting over where the money to but new transitional size clothes are going to be coming from. I'm gonna be doing a lot of shopping at Goodwill or I will be when I get to be a size where there's actually some kind of selection. They don't really carry stuff for people of my generous girth and rather spartan height. Pretty soon I will be getting clothes in regular size stores and I can not wait.
      Well, I didn't get to watch a single movie I downloaded. I just hurt so bad and when I did try to watch them the drugs would make me doze off so I reckon I'll look at some of them here in the comfort of my own home. I was going to be staying with Mamaw & Papaw but I am much more comfortable here. Finally the big surprise I had spoken of for years here on this blog has become a reality. I have the tool I need to get down to a size that does not invite ridicule and harsh judgment. All I need to do now is follow the rules and learn new attitudes regarding food and exercise and I will finally be able to put the moniker, Danny the Gorilla, I was given by the evil older children on the school bus when I was a just a tad bit older that Becca. That name has stuck with me throughout my life, that and Hoss. I always hated to be called Hoss. My elementary gym teacher, Danny Haynes called me Hoss and to this day I still can not stand the man for it. Maybe these feeling are some that will need to be addressed when I begin counseling or therapy or whatever you call it that I plan on doing. I'm gonna close now. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                     It's been done. The pain was pretty bad and still is. I have just taken some pain medication so I am feeling relatively comfortable. I don't have my nicotine patch which was my main concern. Oh well, everything couldn't be perfect.
      I just wanted to let you know that I survived the surgery. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                  Today is the day and I am up way too early. Well, only about an hour early but Becca & I went to bed about two hours too late. I got five movies downloaded for the hospital and I have been wanting to see them all. I have my bag packed. It's just a big toiletry bag because I will not need any clothes. I have my really nice electric razor, my sonic toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, my wallet, my keys, my still and flip video cameras, an extra battery and charger for my still camera, my cell phone, my cell phone charger and my tiny bible. I would have packed a can of dip but I am fresh out. Uncle Rodney brought me a couple of cans Wednesday night so I wouldn't have to get Becca out and those are both gone. Uncle Rodney is a real nice fellow. I know that Grant thinks the world of him and Becca does as well; for that matter, so do I.
      I'm gonna let Becca sleep until I absolutely have to get her up. I dressed her in a warm long sleeve sleeper with feet so I'm not even going to change her clothes. I'm just going to pack her to Mamaw & Papaw's truck. We have to take her to her Mom this morning. Well, I might change her into regular clothes. I haven't decided yet. Yeah, I think I will. I have her clothes laid out and ready to be put on her. It won't take too much extra time.
      I took my measurements this morning and I plan on doing it every Friday. I was shocked by my weight as I weighed 251.2 pounds this morning. I was expecting around 255. The lower weight puts my BMI (Body Mass Index) at 39.9 and that is one point below the mark I need to have the surgery without comorbidities. I am already qualified, approved and scheduled for the surgery so it doesn't matter, plus I have diabetes so I would qualify anyway. Gastric Bypass is said to cure diabetes so I may not have diabetes for long. I'm rambling, aren't I?
      Well, I want to get dressed and try to remember if I am forgetting anything so I will close this out. I am so excited and happy that this is finally happening. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                  My surgery is in the morning. I am so excited to be finally getting this thing done. It's been a long time coming and I am so thankful to be getting this journey underway. Since boot camp I haven't done as well as I could have regarding my pre-op diet. I had about two dozen final big meals and I spent more money on fast food than I usually do. I haven't gained any weight since boot camp though or at least according to my home scales. I was supposed to keep my carbs at 30 grams to shrink my liver because they have to move it during surgery while I am in the pre-op phase and for the most part I have but there's been days when I would get that from a single bite. I believe I have shrunken my liver more than enough. I've lost 20 to 25 pounds since my first appointment.
      There's been an ice storm come through Kentucky this week. Becca hasn't been to school all week and I took Grant to his Mom early this week and I haven't been able to get him because of the ice. Both Becca and I miss the boy terribly bad. He's such a big card. He's so much more mischievous than Becca ever was. It makes for a whole lot more work but he's just so entertaining and fun that I just don't care. I went in to work Monday with no problem but I slid all over the place on the way to work Tuesday morning. There was a ton of people out Tuesday because of the ice. The company bought all of us pizza from Pappa John's for coming in under inclement conditions. I went to bed intending on going to work Wednesday but at around midnight Papaw called and told me that G.E. had cancelled work for Wednesday. That's a big deal because in the near 22 years I have been there I could count on my fingers the times that work has been cancelled on account of weather. I reckon they plan on working tomorrow but I'll be busy getting my anatomy rearranged so I won't be making it in tomorrow. I'll be off for two weeks and maybe just a hair longer or at least that's what the company nurse inferred.
      Today and yesterday I had to be on a liquid diet and I haven't cheated at all. Becca wondered why I couldn't eat and I told her that the doctor didn't want to cut my stomach in half and have a biscuit pop out. She thought that was kinda funny. I'm starving and exhausted because I stayed up entirely too late last night. The ice settled onto the satellite dish and knocked out our satellite service for nearly two whole days. Becca finally made it up here from Mamaw & Papaw's Wednesday evening so I set her up on the computer playing her computer games on NickJr.com. I finally realized that I still had TiVo hooked up to the television and while I don't use it to record programs any longer there were some old episodes of some of her cartoon shows on there so we looked at some TiVo. Finally I went outside and took my long Christmas pole that I use to put up and take down the outside lights and beat the crap out of the dish with it and knocked most of the ice off. When I came back inside the satellite box was finally booting up so finally we had television.
      I had downloaded Kung Fu Panda last night so we ended up watching that on the computer instead of watching television. I also downloaded Eagle Eye, Taken, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and I am in the process of downloading Transporter 3 and Lakeview Terrace. I am downloading these films in case I have an opportunity to watch them while I am in the hospital. I won't be able to watch them all but I might get one watched. I have a few others queued up to download and I suppose I will watch these films while I am off recovering from my surgery.
      I discovered that I hate plain chicken broth. I like chicken noodle soup so I thought I wouldn't have too much of a problem with the broth but I was sorely mistaken. It was so incredibly gross. I have to stay on this liquid diet for about a week after surgery and I had hoped that I would have liked chicken broth to give me some variety. I am nervous about what I can and what I can not eat after the surgery. I have big plans for pureed chili and I saw a recipe for ricotta cheese, cheddar and spaghetti sauce. I'm not real creative in the kitchen so I am a bit worried about variety in the pureed stage. I have discovered something called Almond Breeze that I have been using for my shakes. I like the chocolate best and it mixes well with the chocolate protein and a few packets of equal. I also realized I'm going to have a rough time getting all my water in. I dip so much and while I can drink with a dip in I wonder about how the residue from the dip will affect my new pouch. Well, we'll see. I expect to be sick quite a bit as I discover what my pouch will and will not be able to tolerate.
      I'm looking forward to all of my weight loss. Like I mentioned earlier I have already lost quite a bit since I started this thing. My highest weight was 303 pounds but for some unexplained reason I had lost 26 pounds without even trying. I think it was because of all the stress I've been under since Mom decided to leave. So I started out at 277 pounds and just a few moments ago I unofficially weighed on my new Omron digital scales with body fat monitor and I weighed 255 which is what I wanted to weigh for the surgery. I'm sure I will be weighed again tomorrow at the hospital and I will take an official weigh in on my home scale in the morning. The exercise physiologist told me that my goal weight was 185 but I've been there or at least very close the last time I lost weight. I think with the help of the surgery I can go even lower. My ultimate goal is 169 pounds. I have a number of smaller transitional goals on my journey and things I will do to mark the occasion. I will be starting out at around 255 or there about. My first goal will be 219 pounds which will be a 36 pound loss and I will be trimming the bushy mess that has become my goatee. The weight comes off quickest in the beginning that's why there's such a big gap to my first goal. My next goal will be 199 pounds which will be a 20 pound loss and I will begin growing my hair back when I get there. The next goal will be the one the bariatric center has for me, 185 pounds and I will totally shave my goatee off and be clean shaven and as I said my ultimate goal is 169 and I have no idea what I will be doing for that. It really needs to be a big deal though. Maybe I will try to get myself three or four really nice sets of clothes with fancy new boots and the whole nine yards but that would be expensive. So, from 303 to 169 is a weight loss of 134 pounds. That is entirely doable because I already have 48 of it gone so that leaves me with 86 pounds to lose. I can probably get that done in a year and if I really get after it maybe even before Christmas. I know that the more you have to lose the quicker you do lose in the beginning, for example if I weighed 500 pounds and needed to lose 300 it wouldn't be unreasonable to lose 30 pounds in the first few weeks but since I don't have as much to lose I will be expecting a loss of 15 to 20 pounds in the first month. I certainly hope I am being conservative but I don't want to go into this thinking that I'm going to lose 50 pounds the first month and then coming up ridiculously short. I think 15 to 20 is very realistic.
      Well, it's getting late and Becca is about to get out of the tub. I need to get a good nights rest tonight because I will have a pretty painful day tomorrow. I'll probably even regret doing this at some point tomorrow but those feelings will be temporary and this is what I really want. I know that tomorrow will be one of the top five most important days of my life. It's the beginning of my new life. I plan on asking about being referred to a therapist at my one month follow-up and dealing with some of the issues that I have that may have come from being obese all of my life. I know this will not solve all of my problems but if I am healthy and feel good about who I am I will be in a much better position to deal with other things in my life that need to be addressed.
      I'm sure everything will be okay but just in case I want Becca and Grant to know just how much their Dad loved them. My hope was always to be a father and I am the father to two of the greatest kids I have ever had the privilege to know. I'm not going to dwell on all of that because everything will be fine. I'm sorry that this month this blog has become Daddy's gastric bypass blog but this is important not only to me but to my two precious children as well and I'm sure they'll want to know about it. I'm really going to close this thing out now. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                  Well, I went to my appointment this morning. They called it boot camp. I was given a Gastric Bypass patient handbook with tons of great information and I had to fill out a quiz for the surgeon to demonstrate how well I understood the procedure. I only missed one and I think I missed that one because I probably didn't read the question as closely as I should have. I was weighed with a scale that runs a current of electricity through you to measure not only your weight but your body fat percentage. I'm not even revealing what my body fat percentage was. Let's just say it was kinda high. I saw a well reviewed scale from Omron like it on Amazon.com and I am going to purchase it along with a quality Omron pedometer when I have the available funds. I met with the surgeon and he seemed pretty nice. I read some reviews on him on the internet and it seemed like his mom wrote all of them. The reviews were so wonderful it almost made me kind of suspicious but I'm sure if I have a great surgery with no complications that I will be singing his praises as well. I then got preregistered for the hospital in a little over two weeks. They then told me that the education portion of the day would be in two hours so I called up Mamaw and asked about how Grant & Becca were doing. They were doing fine. I chatted with her for a minute and then I called Auntie Lynn and chatted with her for the better part of an hour. By that time I still had an hour to go before the gastric bypass class. I went out to the car and I got a small dip, even though the hospital grounds are a tobacco free area and read my handbook. I came back in when it was almost time for the class, used the restroom, got a drink of water from a water fountain and went upstairs. The class seemed to last forever and was extremely boring. I did pick up some tidbits of important knowledge that I didn't know before so it was well worth it. I don't reckon I go back over there until the 30th for surgery. I have to go on a liquid diet or maybe a clear liquid diet two days or so before surgery. I'll have to look that up and let me tell y'all, I ain't looking forward to a liquid diet. I'll have to be on a liquid diet for about a week after my surgery but me stomach won't be nearly as demanding as it is now so I think I'll be able to handle it.
      After the doctor I had to go to the unemployment office to check in on my unemployment check for Christmas week and New Year's week. I got there a little after two and wasn't seen until four O'clock that evening. I was glad that I had my gastric bypass handbook with me to read and study. It was kind of difficult reading though because people around me kept on talking so much and all of these people are unemployed so the conversations were all kind of depressing. I may be missing a check but at least I have a decent paying job with insurance that will allow me to get my surgery. I was finally called back and was told that even though I had sent my filing letter in this past Thursday the lady handling my case couldn't do anything about it until tomorrow. I told the lady who I met with that I couldn't ask it to be done any sooner than tomorrow so I left out of there with cautious optimism. I really don't want to ever go back down there. I would have rather went and got my kids from Mamaw & Papaw's and played with them before I had to take them to their Mom.
      I was supposed to have them there by six but I called their Mom and explained my situation to her and she was very understanding. We have been working together very well in regards to the kids. I'm actually pretty proud of us both. I think we will be splitting a few weekends up to work around my surgery. My surgery weekend was supposed to be my weekend but I won't really feel up to having them then so Kristie will be keeping them that weekend. We'll split the weekend before and maybe the weekend after because Kristie doesn't want to trade weekends for good and to tell you the truth neither do I. I like getting them the weekend that I get paid. I will have the kids a few days leading up to my surgery and I suppose I'll take them back to Kristie the Thursday night before surgery or something, I don't know how that will work out. Mamaw or Papaw are going to run and get the kids so I can see them while I am in the hospital. Sherri's apartment where Kristie is staying is actually probably a mile or so from where I'm going to be getting my insides rearranged so that's handy.
      I watched a historically significant Kentucky Wildcat basketball game last night. I didn't watch it live because when I watch it live or even know the score during the game they will lose every time so in doing my part for the team I TiVo the games and watch them later. Jodie Meeks scored 54 points against the Tennessee Volunteers in Tennessee to break Dan Issel's scoring record that he set in 1970 when I was three years old. I haven't mentioned much about my beloved Wildcats the past few years because, frankly they've been rather mediocre and mediocre just isn't any fun when it comes to Kentucky basketball. Maybe this game will turn the tide and we'll get back to being the national powerhouse we rightfully should be. Meeks also set the three point record with ten. It was a fun game to watch.
      Well, I have two more days left to work this week and I am very tired so I will close this out and go to bed. I get the kids back Saturday morning. Usually it's Thursday night but I had them one extra night this week because Kristie couldn't find a way to get Becca to school so in the interest of fairness I agreed to let her have them for one and a half days of my weekend. See, we're both being very civil about this whole unfortunate mess. Anyway, I think I may be going out to either Golden Corral or Cracker Barrel for one last good carb loaded breakfast before surgery. I'm supposed to be eating only 30 carbs a day now and most days I stick to that but others I don't and I want one more big meal and I reckon it'll be breakfast. I have lost 15 pounds since my initial appointment a few days before Christmas so I am going in the right direction. I've had some stress over my unemployment and ate some stuff I shouldn't have so I now know that I am a stress triggered eater. I never paid much attention to it before but I guess that's what I am. My primary way of dealing with stress is retail therapy which means that spending money makes me feel good but if the stress is coming from the fact that I don't have any money I reckon I use food to deal with it. I have a whole bunch of stuff to work on this year. I might even see a therapist or something to help me learn new ways to deal with stress and new ways to deal with social situations which I loath. I am not a people person and I really wish that I were. Oh well, we'll see. I've been rambling and now I will close this post for real. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                  Big news! I have my surgery date. I go in to have my insides rearranged January 30th. That's a little over two weeks away. I can't wait for the pounds to start rolling off. This would be maybe the third or fourth best time of my life if it wasn't for the fact that I have no money because there's been problems with my unemployment for the time I was off during Christmas & New Years. I have an appointment to meet with my surgeon, Dr. Steiner tomorrow and I have to do lots of other stuff but I couldn't hear what was said on the phone so I won't know what all I have to do until tomorrow. After I get done there I have to go to the unemployment office and try to get all of this crap taken care of.
      I would love to go on and on about the surgery but with the problems with my unemployment I just don't feel like it. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Dear Becca & Grant,
                     My big surprise can now be revealed. I had a phone call this afternoon confirming that insurance has approved my gastric bypass surgery. That's right, I am actually going to have gastric bypass surgery. I weighed 276.7 lbs. when I had my first appointment, which is actually way down from my highest of 303 lbs. and Wednesday when I went for a nutritional meeting I weighed 269.6 pounds. The exercise physiologist quoted my goal weight at 185 pounds but I would love to get down to 175 because I was probably that size when I was in middle school, Jacob's age.
      Let me tell you all about my journey to get to this point in the process. Years ago I first mentioned in this blog something about a big surprise or secret that I had for all of us. It must have been two and a half years since I first mentioned it. I can't seem to find the original post in the blog but there's years worth of posts to search through so it's not too surprising. Anyway I went to the seminar years ago and was excited about the prospect of getting the surgery but I had to have six months of a regular diet administered by a physician before insurance would cover the surgery so I did that and by that time I was out of available time off at work. Your Mom signed up for the surgery and even had her initial appointment but she learned that she was pregnant. We lost that pregnancy but it seemed like she became pregnant with my favorite boy, Grant very soon after that. So her being pregnant knocked her out of having the surgery for a good long while.
      The end of 2007 came around and I attended the seminar again and submitted my insurance to St. Jospeh East Bariatric Center. They called a few days later and said that my insurance did not cover gastric bypass surgery under any circumstance. I called the insurance company myself and asked them about it and they told me the same thing. Kristie was afraid to tell me because she knew I would be upset because this is something I had really been wanting. I was incredibly disappointed but I simply resolved to wait and try again the next year. It appeared I handled it pretty well but I was torn up on the inside. If I had been the crying type I would have balled my eyes out. I had really wanted that surgery. What didn't make any sense was the fact that they did cover it when Kristie signed up for it. I believe both the bariatric center and I both got hold of someone who didn't know what they were talking about or maybe the policy did change.
      In 2008 General Electric changed insurance companies so I thought I'd give it one last shot. I was busy with a preschooler and an infant at the beginning of the year so I didn't have time to look into the possibilities early in 2008 so I waited until the end of the year. I called the insurance even before I scheduled the seminar. They informed me that gastric bypass was indeed covered. I was encouraged by that but I didn't get my hopes up too much because things seem to happen to me that kind of thwart my hopes and desires. I'm not being overly pessimistic I'm just stating the facts. Anyway, I scheduled the seminar late in November and once again submitted my insurance card. I got a call a few weeks later to schedule my initial appointment. I was now as close as Kristie had gotten.
      My appointment was scheduled for the 18th of December. I started filling out a psychological questionnaire with 430 questions. Some of the questions were laughable such as does my spirit ever leave my body and do I ever think that the entire world is plotting against me. A good portion of the questionnaire had to do with alcohol dependency though and seeing as how my spirit always seems to actually stay in my body and I am not a drinker to any degree that I would even bother mentioning I thought I would be okay. I met with the exercise physiologist who was filling in for the nutritionist who was on maternity leave and along with three others we learned all about the pre-op diet and a little about eating after surgery. I was weighed, my height was taken, they measured around my waist and chest and then they took a picture of me. I then went into an examination room to wait on one of the internists on staff there. My blood pressure was taken like they always do when you go to the doctor and I was asked a series of medical related questions. I was asked if I smoked and I told them I did not smoke but I did use smokeless tobacco and she recorded that on my chart. I had been worried about that because they will under no circumstances perform the surgery on someone who smokes. I asked one of the surgeons about my dipping habit and was told that they would do the surgery but wouldn't wanting me dipping for some time after surgery. I was so relieved but I did know that they would find massive amounts of nicotine in my blood because of the dip and I wanted them to know it wasn't from cigarettes. That's why I told them I used smokeless tobacco. I finished my questionnaire as I waited on the doctor. He finally came in and I rather liked him. I wish I could remember his name because I think I would like to go to him as my regular physician if he sees people as a primary care physician. He did the things that doctors do and I was done. I made another appointment for tests to be run for the twenty-second of December.
      The twenty-second rolled around and my appointment was for eleven O'clock in the morning and I had to have someone drive me there. Papaw took me and then he took off. I sat in the waiting room for a good hour and a half. I was afraid they had forgotten about me but I was eventually called back. It was time for my psychological evaluation. It really wasn't what I was expecting at all. Maybe I've seen too much television dealing with such things. He simply asked me a few questions; questions I had already answered on the questionnaire and then he said that from his end I was approved. I had to go elsewhere to get blood drawn and then I had to go to yet another part of the building for two more tests. I had to call Papaw because someone had to be there when I started the second test. The first one they did was an EEG or an EKG, I never can remember which one is which. They had me sign papers stating I would not drive an automobile or sign any legal documents the rest of the day. They really emphasized how I would be rather loopy after the next test. Papaw showed up and about a half an hour later they came to get me for my endoscopy. They were going to put me asleep and take a look inside my stomach with a camera. They had me gargle some of the most awful tasting stuff I had ever put in my mouth and then the sadistic monster made me do it again. Then he took a pair of long forceps with a saturated cotton swab and rubbed something on the very back of my mouth until I gagged. I remember the nurse then saying that the drug she was preparing to place in my IV would put me to sleep. The next thing I remember was sitting up talking to Papaw and thinking that they really over emphasized the effect of the drugs because I felt great. I was lucid and sober. Once again my memory left me. Next I remember walking to Papaw's car which was parked along the street and I was commenting on the lousy parking situation they have there and then I blacked out again. My memory finally came back for good when we were sitting in Taco Bell and I was eating tacos. I was famished because it was now four O'clock in the afternoon and I hadn't eaten anything since the night before. I guess they didn't want to find any half digested pancakes in my stomach when they did the endoscopy. Anyway, it appears that the drugs they gave me did actually pack the wallop they said it did. The doctor told Papaw that they only had to give me half of what they normally give patients. I was awful sleepy and tired that day. I was so excited about the tests that I didn't sleep all that well.
      I next had to schedule a stress test through my primary care physician. It was scheduled for this past Monday, the ninth. I was supposed to go back to work that day but my appointment was for 8:30 so I called in the first day back to work, again. I showed up and was directed to where I needed to be. I signed in and paid my co-pay and waited for about a half and hour and then was taken back. They put and IV in my hand and pumped me full of a dye. They then showed me to a waiting room with a television. They had to wait for the dye to circulate through my system. I got into some shows on the History Channel dealing with the apocalypse mentioned in Revelation and then I dozed off. I was tired that day as well because I was so excited the night before and didn't sleep well. They woke me up and took pictures of my chest. It looked like an x-ray machine but they didn't hide behind a wall and they didn't cover my privates with a lead blanket so it couldn't have been an x-ray machine. I don't know what that thing was called. I went back to the waiting room and shortly someone else came for me. They took me in a room with a treadmill and a big medical looking measuring machine. A nurse shaved my chest in a few places and placed electrodes all over me. I was hooked up to the big medical looking machine and the treadmill started up. I walked for nine minutes and my heart rate got up to 160 and while it was there something else was shot into me via the IV. I walked on the treadmill for a little while longer and then I sat down. The nurse took my blood pressure a few times while my heart rate decreased. Eventually they took me back to the waiting room and after a very few minutes the picture taking guy came and got me again. They took another round of pictures of my chest and then said I was free to leave.
      Tuesday the insurance coordinator at the St. Joseph East Center for Weight Loss Surgery called while I was at work. I returned her call immediately. She wanted to know if I had had a chance to get the stress test done. I told her that I had just had it done the day before. She said she would wait on the results to be faxed to her and then call me back or if it hadn't been faxed in a week she would call me back and I would go down to the cardiologist's office and remind them. I fully expected to have to go remind them to fax the results over. Maybe I am pessimistic, but if I am it's not without reason.
      Wednesday I had to rush across town after work to a nutrition class at St. Joseph East. I was ten minutes late and everyone looked at me when I walked in but I was one of the skinniest people in there so strangely enough it didn't bother me so much. She talked about what I would be eating directly after surgery, ice chips; 2 to 3 days while I am in the hospital, clear liquids; 1 to 3 weeks after surgery, pureed protein and protein shakes; 3 to 4 weeks after surgery, two to three ounces of solid protein and protein drinks and on from there. She also emphasized the water rules which are no drinking with meals or an hour after. No more gulping water which will be my biggest obstacle to cross because I love nothing better than to turn up a cool bottle of water and kill the thing. I absolutely have to drink 64 ounces of fluid a day, but slowly and I absolutely have to take my vitamins. These are rules for the rest of my life. She also emphasized the need for hot liquids to help fight the inevitable build up of mucous. Pleasant thought that is. I learned a lot but still I was apprehensive about the possibility that I might actually get the surgery.
      Today when I got home I noticed I had a voice mail on my cell phone. It was the director of the Center for Weight Loss Surgery, the head lady in charge. She wanted me to return her call and I couldn't get to a phone fast enough. I called and she informed me that the insurance had approved me and that the center had approved me and wanted to talk about surgery dates. I was floored. I was expecting a long drawn out wait with the insurance company and maybe even an appeal or two but it came in without me even getting a chance to worry about it too much. I like it when things work out like that. The earliest they could do it was the 30th of this month but I have no idea what I will have to do to get my short term disability in place so I told her I would check with work and call her back Monday. I wish now that I had scheduled for the 30th but maybe I'll wait until the middle of February. I want this done and I want it done now but I also don't want to use my own vacation time to do it. I am superdy duperdy excited.
      I decided to start my pre-op diet the day after Christmas. I did okay that day but I had brownies the next day, not okay. I didn't do real great until the first of the year and even then I had a few slip ups. SInce then I've done relatively okay. I could have done better and I really am not at the top of my diet game right now but when I weighed Wednesday night at the center with the scales they used when I first went in there it said I had lost seven pounds so I am going in the right direction. They will not do surgery if you haven't already been losing weight. They want you to keep your carbs at 30 grams a day so that your liver will be smaller and more easily manageable when they have to move it to do the surgery.
      I have never been more anxious for a Monday to come. I will find out all I need to know, take care of those issues and will call the director and set up my surgery date. This is like Christmas for me, only two weeks late. I have a whole lot of stress in my life right now. Even more than anyone knows but this has been a ray of sunshine that I am able to hold to and ride with all my being. I know that there's a lot of hard work ahead of me and that this will not solve all of my problems but if I feel good about who I am and just feel good physically I will be better able to tackle the hardships ahead with an unforgiving vengeance. I remember back about sixteen years ago or so I had gotten myself into pretty decent shape physically. I felt like I was invincible and that I just couldn't be stopped. I hope to have that feeling again because there was no greater rush.
      The kids are doing fine. Becca and I had a really nice long week together and we had a ball. I got Grant Wednesday night after the nutritional meeting and had to take him back Thursday night. I really hated that because by the time I got him home he was ready for bed and by the time I got home Thursday evening it was time to take him right back to his mom. I didn't get to spend any time with him at all but of course it must be even worse on Kristie because she didn't get to spend that much time this past week with Becca.
      I plan on giving the house a real good cleaning tomorrow and even though the Christmas stuff is down it now needs to be neatly packed away in our Christmas tubs and placed in the attic. The house needs it like you wouldn't believe. Actually using your kitchen for food preparation rather than snack storage really creates quite the mess. I'm just used to getting something fast, lately Taco Bell has been my favorite.
      Well, I am starving right now, something I won't have to worry much about after surgery, so I will close this out and go have myself a disgusting protein drink and maybe a piece of cheese. I may not be able to drink with food after the surgery and while I am trying to get into the fluidless meals I haven't had the surgery yet so I won't be doing any damage by having a protein drink and a piece of fat free cheese. Daddy loves Rebecca & Grant!

Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass Surgery

I am approved by insurance for the surgery. I will be scheduling it next week. WOOPEEE!!!!!!