Saturday, July 31, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Greetings, my little girl. You are four weeks old today. You are such a good baby. You hardly ever cry. You're swinging in your little green swing at this moment. Your eyes are wide open and it looks like you want to get a little fussy. Your mother put in a Baby Einstein video for you to look at. We have three of them. Baby Van Gogh, Baby Mozart and you are now watching Language Nursery. You seem to like them. I'm sure you will get more use out of them as you get older.
   Mamaw, Papaw, Aunt Lynn, Uncle Rodney, Allison, Jacob, Jon, Granny, Uncle Mike and Aunt Chris left this morning for Colorado. They really hated to leave you but they had already had the vacation planned. We couldn't go because of you. Of course we probably wouldn't have gone anyway because of your mother's accident from last year. She's still not one-hundred percent. I had to take a little break during the last sentence because you wanted the rest of the bottle I thought you had finished before I sat down at the computer.
   I'm sorry I haven't written more in the blog the last few weeks but as I'm sure you know, babies are pretty time consuming. Plus we had a whole lot of work and shopping to do for our new home. It looks really fantastic. It feels just like home at this point.
   Well, I'm gonna let you go for now. I'll of course write some more when I get around to it. Love you, Rebecca.

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Gosh, it seems we barely have the time to sit down and type out a post to you anymore. We have been busy busy busy whipping our new home into shape. It's coming along very nicely. Of course, when we aren't busy with that, we are still busy cooing over you. You turned three weeks old this past Saturday. Time is really flying by. Right now I am printing out your announcements. I designed them myself. They are cute. At least I think so, but I could be biased.
   You were quite the fussy gal tonight. You had never really been this fussy before. It had Daddy and I a bit concerned but you seemed fine after we walked you and rocked you a while. I called the pediatrician because we had never heard you very much but tonight you really let loose. You really had me and Daddy on our toes. But we don't mind a bit.
   Aunt Mary is supposed to come up this weekend. Whether she will or not, I don't know. I have learned not to count on whatever rolls off good ole Aunt Mary's tongue. I love her... but OY! But hopefully she will be here and get to see you. Well, little girl, it is two a.m. Yesterday was Mommys birthday, but Daddy and I are going out tomorrow while Aunt Lynn keeps you. I think you like staying with Aunt Lynn. Your cousins all keep you entertained. As I was saying.. if I am going to the movie.. I need some shut eye. I love you baby girl. Night Night.

Monday, July 19, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello, little girl. You were due today. I guess you fooled us all, because now you are two weeks and two days old. You really are doing fantasticly well. Today you brought your hands together to find your little angel rattle. I am quite proud of you for that, you aren't really supposed to bring your hands together until towards the end of the month. See, you are already excelling.
   Well, our first day alone together was nice. Mama got to spend lots of time cuddling at you and cooing at you. I got a few loads of laundry done (including yours - well let me rephrase - MOSTLY yours) and even got the chance to make Daddy some home made peanut butter cookies. I also set some aside for our new neighbor and his son and a few for Mamaw and Papaw. Daddy doesn't really need to eat a lot of sweets. He is diabetic and it is bad for him. Well, technically a lot of sugar is bad for EVERYONE. So don't expect too many peanut butter cookies when you get older. You will get some. But you will not get a lot.
   Well I just wanted to check in with you and let you know how wonderful you are. And you are becoming more wonderful each day. I love you so much, my precious baby girl. Now, while you are resting, I will try to as well.

Sunday, July 18, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello my beautiful baby girl. Today you are 15 days old. Yesterday was your two week birthday. Daddy and I are so proud of you, you are doing so well! Your belly button cord fell off day before yesterday while Mamaw & Papaw were here visiting. We all gave you a big round of applause. You really didn't seem to think it was too much of a big deal, lol. I was tempted to save that little knotted piece of skin but I couldn't bring myself to do it, as hard as it was to throw away, it was too gross to keep it. (No offense) I did, however, keep the clip the hospital tied it off with. I am going to put that in your memory box. There are so many things I want to put in there, so I am going to have to get a nice big box. You have been sponge-bathed since you have been home from the hospital, and you have had your hair washed to keep you from getting cradle cap. But, tonight you had your very first "tub bath" in the baby tub that Mamaw bought for you. You actually were immersed in the water this time. You fussed a bit when I got you naked but when I got you into the nice warm water you calmed right down. You seemed to enjoy the bath. You have always enjoyed your hair washed. Daddy took a couple of pictures of you in your very first "tub." Your great grandma Annetta was here to witness it all. She is always quite concerned about your little feet being covered up. She swears up and down if we don't cover them, you will get colic. She is a funny old bird. We do keep your feet covered, though, because your little tootsies do get cold!
   Well Daddy goes back to work tomorrow, so I suppose it's just you and I tomorrow. Maybe, just maybe, Mommy will get some money to buy you a nice car to ride in tomorrow. I really hope so. I have learned not to count my chickens before they hatch, though. Daddy and I hope we get it. We really need it for some things. I know that Daddy will miss you like crazy tomorrow. I don't think I could bear the thought of being away from you for a whole eight hours just yet; It kills me to be gone an hour and a half. Aunt Lynn is your usual babysitter and I know that you are just fine with her and I don't worry about you at all. It's just that I can barely stand the thought of being away from you! Maybe that will change someday but for right now Mommy wants to be with you every minute. So anyway, I feel so sorry for Daddy. I am the lucky lady who gets to be here with you all day long! Now, if I get that money tomorrow and I have to go get it early in the day I will have to let Auntie Lynn keep you for a little while. But rest assured I will be back in a flash to get my little gal. I love you so much.
There is no describing the level of love I feel for you in my heart. I only ever want the best for you. I hope and pray that I will be a good mother to you. God knows I will try. Well little girl, now you are sleeping. Soon you will wake up to eat. Now I have to go and do Dad a Proud Pappa Picture Book to show off at work tomorrow and take a shower before you do. See you soon my sweet baby.

Thursday, July 15, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                  You, my sweet little girl, have turned into an eating & pooping machine. We had to take you to the doctor this morning at eleven and then your mother had a doctor's appointment for 1:30. We went to bed just a hair earlier than we have been the last few weeks. We took you upstairs for your first night in your very own room and as soon as we put you down your eyes flew open. So your mother stayed up with you. She eventually surmised that you were hungry. It really wasn't time for you to be hungry but as all the books and doctors have said, you can't tell time. Your Mom fed you and then went to bed. About and hour and a half later we heard you squalling over the monitor. I went to check in on you. Your diaper was fine and holding you didn't seem to calm you much. So I fed you again. You had five ounces last night. I know that doesn't seem like much but up until now you were happy with 2 ounces every four hours or so.
   We got up and took you to see Doctor Straub again. He twisted your little legs to check out your hips. You no longer have much jaundice at all and you're up to seven pounds after going down to six pounds and 8 ounces from seven four at birth. You were fine in all other regards. We had a long wait for your mom's appointment so we went to Cici's, a pizza buffet that's real cheap, for lunch. That was your first visit to a restaurant. You didn't seem to want anything.....LOL. Then we went to Staples and I found the computer desk i want. Then on to your Mother's appointment. She is having just a little problem with the incisions they made when they drug you out of her. I have to pack cloth strips inside of her belly twice a day. Anyway, you filled your diapers good at your mom's doctor. We cleaned you up real good but your little butt was still puckered so we knew there was more to come. We then went to Walmart. Your first trip there too. You will be in there many many times in your life. We really didn't want to take you out and about so much so soon but we really did need a few things at Walmart. You needed some more diapers that fit your tiny bottom (They were out), an extra (good) bottle, some nursery water, your dad needed some black olives because I've recently got on a black olive kick and your mother needed some ant killer because she does not like ants in the house.
   We came home and you had finished soiling the diaper that we knew would get soiled. We watched a movie and I sat down to write this. Your aunt Lynn talked to me for agood long while on AOL Instant meesenger, so it's now after midnight and everything that I said happened earlier that day now happened yesterday. You then got real fussy so I fed you and laid you down to sleep. I then fixed myself some leftover pork roast, mashed taters, green beans, apple sauce and cheese biscuits with cherry kool-aid to wash it all down with. I was just getting ready to set down and eat when you started fussing again. So now I am at this moment holding you in my left arm and typing this with my right all the while trying to eat my pork roast meal. Ain't parenthood grand. I'll let you go now because you're getting fussy again. Love you!

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello my gorgeous baby girl. Today you are ten days old. My, time just keeps flying by. Right now I am sitting at the computer with your father. You are here with us, too. He is feeding you Similac Advance with Iron in a cute pink bottle with a rattle top that your Mamaw got you at our baby shower. I think maybe I am more entertained by the rattle top than you are. As I am sure you will learn, Mommy can also sometimes be a big kid. But that's good, that means that you and I should have lots of fun together.
   I can't believe how beautiful you are. You only grow more beautiful every day. Daddy and I are so lucky to have you. There are people in this world who have almost everything but cannot have a child. I used to think I was one of those people, but God decided to give you to me. I don't know why; I don't deserve you. I can't imagine being without you now, I can't imagine knowing what it would be like not being able to have you. My life started the day I met your father and our lives together started the day you were born. We are so lucky.
   A few things I wanted to tell you about the hospital visit, but haven't had the chance, are to follow in this post. First of all, you were really giving Mommy a rough way to go the night of July 02, 2004. Mommy kept having what Aunt Lynn has deemed "monkey pains" and what I knew were contractions - they kept telling me I they couldn't see that but regardless of what they could see I could FEEL it. I was in a lot of pain when your Aunt Lynn told me to ask when I got to make some decisions. So I did. Apparently I was pretty adamant about it from what they tell me - I don't remember much about it - I was tired and on stay-dol (a narcotic to dull the pain - which failed miserably) and in pain. The only thing the stay-dol succeeded in doing was making me yell at Daddy and get loopy. Your Aunt Lynn is a big cut-up and she was getting Daddy to cut up which Mommy really was NOT in the mood for at the time. Aunt Lynn and Mamaw thought it was hilarious how I would yell at Daddy and then cry because I thought he was mad at me. I even kicked him out of the room once. Daddy seemed to understand though; Mommy was really hurting. They finally gave me an epidural and made the decision to do the C-section. In my mind I silently thanked God for that and was so happy that I would finally get to meet you. Also I was extremely happy for the epidural so I could get out of some of the pain. You were worth every ounce of it though, and I would do it again and again and again and again. I hope you know that.
   We waited for a while for Dr. Youkilis to arrive but when he could not get there Dr. Duncan decided that he would do the delivery. At that point Cheetah the Chimp could have delivered you as long as he was sterile and knew what he was doing to keep you and I safe. I no longer cared; I just wanted you out and in my arms. Finally they told Daddy that you would be here somewhere between 9 am and noon. Daddy predicted you would be here by nine-thirty. He was only four minutes off, because as you know you joined us at 9:26. The nurse I had throughout your labor was not very friendly. I don't know why, but she seemed to have no personality and didn't really want to talk or be friendly with anyone. Perhaps something bad had happened to her earlier that day. I will never know. But, shortly before you were born a nurse who was WONDERFUL came to work with us. Her name was Leslie. She was fantastic. She was friendly and helpful and understanding and she did everything she could to make sure I was comfortable and ready for you to be here. Even Mamaw and Aunt Lynn were impressed with her. When we finally got to the operating room she was there to make sure you and I were alright throughout the operation. The anesthesiologist was very friendly, too. He was very supportive and kept me very calm - and I don't mean with just his drugs. He was good at what he did. A nice Asian resident by the name of Dr. Lee was there to assist Dr. Duncan. There is a very funny story about he and Dr. Bennet and I that will tell you someday, but I would not want any readers of this here blog to take offense. People can be very touch these days. Dr. Duncan had spoken to me previously about your delivery but hardly said three words to me in the O.R. - but like I said, it could have been Cheetah the Chimp down there as long as he had a medical degree. And when you came into the world and your Daddy brought you over to see me, I cried and thanked God for you a thousand times over. You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. My precious, beautiful daughter. You are everything I ever wanted. You are more. And I love you beyond measure.
   Well, you have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and so do I. So I suppose I had better give Daddy his computer back and you and I should get ourselves some shut-eye. I love you, Rebecca.
Dear Rebecca,
                  Six more days until you are due, but I suppose that doesn't matter at all now because you were a little early bird. You are the sweetest thing God ever put on this planet. Still I am in awe of you. You're eating really good. We had been giving you two ounces of formula every 3 to 4 hours but it seems like you want a little more so we've been fixing up a four ounce bottle and you've been taking about two and a half ounces. Your Mama called you her little bird because of the way you ate when you first got home and now she's calling you Mama's little pig. Last night you woke your Daddy up at 2:20 to eat. You took two and three-quarter ounces and we slept until almost 6:30. We've been keeping a record of when and how much you eat so we can ask your pediatrician about it Wednseday. We don't want to starve you but we don't wanna make you chubby either.
   I've gotten so much better at holding and handling you. I was so afraid in the beginning. You're the first baby I've held. I feel like an old pro now. You like laying on your tummy on Daddie's hairy chest. You slept there for hours yesterday. You also love your swing that either Mamaw or your Aunt Lynn got for you. We've been playing your Mozart CD for you a whole lot. You seem to like it, but maybe that's just my imagination. Mozart is supposed to make you excel in mathmatics and make you smarter in general. You are already super smart and baby model beautiful so I don't think we have anything to worry about there. You really are and that's just not a proud papa talking. I was prepared for an ugly baby because I have always thought that most babies were really kinda ugly, but not you. You look like me and how could anything that looks like me be ugly when I, myself am just so incredibly good looking.
   You are also a pacifier baby. We had wanted to not get you started on a pacifier but you started gnawing on your fist and it won't be long until you find your thumb so we decided that it would be easier to break you from the nookie, as I call it or the binky, as your mom calls it, than break you from the thumb. Jon, your cousin, who loves you like crazy, still sucks on his thumb and he is seven now. So we've decided, as I've mentioned before, to let you have your pacifier.
   Well, that's it for today. I'm gonna go hold you on my chest while I look at a little television. You are such a good baby. You hardly ever cry. Of course I like to think that's because your mother & I are such fantastic parents. One day when you're grown we'll ask you if you agree with our evaluation of our parenting skills. I hope we do right by you, Little Girl. Your Daddy loves you so very much.

Saturday, July 10, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
               Hello, my beautiful baby girl. Today you are a week old. My, how time has flown. I am so sorry that I haven't posted before now, I can barely bring myself to put you down long enough to do anything now that you are here. In addition to that, when I do put you down, I am trying to get our new place all put together. I want you to have a nice home to live in.
   I can't believe how much I love you. I thank God every day that he gave you to me. I know I don't deserve something so precious so I will do my best to always make sure you are happy. Sometimes when I look at you tears well up in my eyes knowing that you are finally here and we are now a family. Daddy loves you so much and I know he will always try to be a good father to you. I will always try to be a good mother.
   I can't believe how beautiful you are. I stare at you so much. Your tiny little hands, tiny little feet, and your tiny little nose. That's Daddy's nose. The only thing you really have from me is my chin and the top shape of my ears. Oh yes, and my feet. Poor you. However, it is odd how cute they are on you and not on me. LOL!
   You are the one thing I have always wanted in my life. I can't believe how lucky I am. When you were born I cried and thanked God for you, and I have thanked him every day since. You'll never know just how special you are to me. Daddy and I never thought for a minute we could have something so special and precious. Yet, here you are. I have an overwhelming feeling of protection towards you; I never want you out of my sight. I know that may change someday but for now, I want you near me all the time, I want to hold you, touch you, love you as much as I can. I am so glad that you are here...you have given Daddy and I the best gift in the whole world. Now we have a family.

Friday, July 09, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                  You'll be 6 days old in the morning. You've been home since Tuesday morning. I'm sorry I haven't been able to post you blog since the last one. The computer was still at the old house and we have had the electric shut off over there. So I very well couldn't use the ole' computer without any juice, now could I? I've finally moved the computer from the old house over to our new place. Although we still can't get internet service because it's taking so very long to change over our phone service, I still have Microsoft Word. So I am typing your post up on that and I will cut & paste this post onto the blog almost the minute we get our phone hooked up. You know your father; I am having a cow without the internet. Of course I really haven't had much time to be on the computer the past few days even if it were here. You've been keeping your mother & I very busy the past week. For instance, during the last sentence I had to get up and go upstairs and get a receiving blanket for you and your mother told me you just ate an ounce and a half of formula. You're having Similac Advance with Iron.
Okay, Tuesday morning I drove my car up to G.E. and got the Explorer from your Papaw. Our air conditioner is on the fritz and we wanted you to be comfortable for your very first automobile ride. I made a quick stop at WalMart for a neck stabilizer for your car seat. It seems that we had forgotten all about a neck stabilizer. I also got a preemie sleeper for you. You are so much smaller than they said you would be. And for your dear ole' Daddy-O I got a white chocolate Reese Cup. Your Daddy-O likes white chocolate Reese Cups. After Walmart I stopped at McDonalds for breakfast for your mother and me. I had a scrambled egg, a biscuit with jelly, a piece of sausage, a hash brown and a medium coke while your mom had gravy and a biscuit with orange juice. I then rushed over to Central Baptist hospital because your mom wanted me there by 9:45 that morning so we could both talk to your pediatrician. I made it into the parking garage by 9:45 but it took me almost a half an hour to find a place to park. I made it upstairs a little after 10:00, but your doctor had not yet been around to talk to us so that was good.
When I got there they almost immediately took you away for your third hearing test. You had failed your first one but we were told that it's not uncommon for that to happen. You were just a little too fussy when they gave you your second so those scores didn't count. You passed your third test with flying colors, much to your mother's relief. She was nervous; I on the other hand knew you were perfect in every way. While you were away having your hearing test we had our McDonalds breakfast. Your mother didn't want all of her gravy and I had already put jelly on my biscuit so I tried the gravy on my egg and it was yummy. I think I'll do that again.
Now, the time was drawing near that you come home. Your mom sent me out to the Explorer with all the stuff that had accumulated in her room over the weekend. Clothes, makeup, stereo and the like. She called me on my cell phone while I was still in the garage and told me I had to bring down your car seat because they had to verify that we had one. So I grabbed that and headed back to where you and your mom were at. I got back up to the room and realized I had left the neck stabilizer in the car. I had to venture out once again in the heat and humidity to retrieve your neck stabilizer. I got back with it and I set it up. I decided to go get the car and wait for your mom to bring you down. Sure enough as I set there anxiously waiting I saw them roll your mom out with you in the car seat on her lap. I fastened you onto the car seat base and loaded your mom in the car, (she rode in the back seat with you), and away we went. On the way home we saw a funny site right there in the city; an Amish woman wearing a long dress and riding a three wheeled bicycle. I reckon a three wheeled bicycle would more properly be called a tricycle but those are for children. It cracked both your mom and me up greatly. We had to make a stop at the drug store so your mother could get some medicine. I fed you while your mother was in the store. Then it was on to our new home for the three of us.
The first day was kinda quiet. Everybody was at work and your Aunt Lynn wanted to allow us some private time to introduce you to your new home, although she did put up some really cute balloons and a door banner announcing you to the world. That was really nice of her. Let me tell you this right now little girl. After your mother and I there will never be another person care for you more than your Aunt Lynn. She is flat out nuts over you. Eventually Mamaw and Papaw showed up. Mamaw brought us all supper from Captain D's. Aunt Linda, her son Nicholas and Granny came by just a little before Mamaw and Papaw showed up. They didn't stay long. Mamaw, Papaw, your mom and I spent the rest of the night just looking at you. I went to bed early that night while your mom stayed downstairs with you. You slept in your Travelin' Tot 3-in-1 thingy. Your mom wanted a Pack & Play, but the one we wanted was way too expensive so we went with the Travelin' Tot instead. The Travelin' Tot is a collapsible play pen that also has a bassinet and a changing table on it. We decided that to keep your mother from climbing the stairs to much right after her c-section we would keep you downstairs for about a week.
We went and saw the lawyer about something to do with the near fatal accident that your mother was involved in 367 days before you were born. Then you had your very first doctor visit. We had been told in the hospital that you had a slight touch of jaundice. We just thought you had a complexion like your Papaw or your Aunt Mary. Silly, ain't we? The doctor said you had just a mild case and would probably just poop it on out. And, of course, in all other regards you were perfect. I could have told him that. We went directly home after that. Your Aunt Lynn, Jon and Jacob showed up just minutes after we arrived because we had asked them to baby sit you for a little bit. We then went to the old house and got our good ole' kitty, Samson, and very unwillingly took him to the Anderson County Humane Society. We really hated to give Samson up. He had been so much a part of our lives the last four years. Your mother was balling like a baby, even more than a baby because you don't cry all that much. You just sleep. Anyway, even I almost shed a tear over having to give up one of my best friends. And he was that. I've never known such a loving and affectionate kitty. Even if we hadn't moved I doubt if we could have kept him. We just wish that you could have known what a noble and sweet cat he was. Even now it makes me sad to think of giving him up. It was harder than giving the house up.
We then went to Kroger in Versailles for some distilled water for your formula and spring water for Mom and me. We then went to McDonalds and got twenty some odd dollars worth of food for Aunt Lynn, the boys, your mother and me. We then went home and ate. We went down to Mamaw and Papaw's for a little bit that evening. Your mother started to feel bad so we went home. Papaw and your Uncle Rodney tried to help me set up my Dish Network receiver. It didn't work so I reckon we will eventually have to go back to cable.
The next day I spent it unpacking boxes. Nothing much else happened on that day. Today I unpacked some more and went grocery shopping. All of your great great aunts, Granny's sisters came to visit you while I was away. Alicia stopped by as well. The preacher and his wife visited for a few minutes. We took a walk up the street and showed you off to some former neighbors and then I loaded up the computer, set it up here on the kitchen table (I'm getting a new computer desk next week), and began to write you this little note.
Well, I'm done with this blog entry. The past few days have been the most exciting of my life. I am in awe that I could have a hand in creating something as wonderful and beautiful as you. Kristie told me the other day that I had always been the best thing that had ever happened to her but now that she has you, I am the second best thing that's ever happened to her. I understand completely what she means because I feel the same way about it. I love you with a love that I never thought could be attained.

Monday, July 05, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                  Here it is, a few days after your birth. I am in total awe of you. I loathe to leave you. You are still in the hospital with your mother right now. I came home to get some sleep because I didn't sleep well in the hospital with you and your mother. They leave you in the room with us most of the time. They take you to the nursery between six a.m. & 9 a.m. for your pediatric visit.
   Friday afternoon we went to Walmart to purchase some items for the new place. We got home late and sat up for a little while. I was thinking about going to bed when it was around eleven. Then your mother picked up the phone and called the hospital. She said she was having pains and stuff. The doctor said it sounded like she was in labor. I was getting ready to go to the hospital when your mamaw & papaw showed up out of the blue. My mom & dad were very excited. Your mother & I went to the hospital. Eventually your Mamaw and Lynn showed up. Everyone was so tired. We had all been up for around 24 hours at the time. They gave your mother an epidural eventually. She was in a whole lot of pain and she told them in no uncertain terms that she would not be leaving the hospital without a bay so they had just better decide to deliver you. Your regular doctor was out of town so Doctor Duncan was going to deliver you. I tried to take a nap while we waited. Your Aunt Lynn and Mamaw made fun of me for sleeping at such an important time. I wanted to be well rested. All I got was a half an hour. Eventually they came for your mom. She was going to have a c-section. They put me in scrubs and wheeled your mom away. Aunt Lynn and Mamaw told me to follow them, so I did. The nurses ran me back into the room. I went back in the room and sat down. I dozed off. I was still incredibly tired. The nurse came and got me. I waled into the operating room without my mask on. A nurse nearly tackled me and yanked my mask up. I sat by your mother's head as she lay on the operating table. I was nervous as they began to work. Your mother said it felt like they were yanking her bladder out. They told her that your head was under her bladder so they were moving it to the side. That was a little more information than I needed just at that time. Eventually I saw a big vat begin to fill with a bloody clearish fluid and I knew that they had broken her water and you soon would be here.
   Then a tiny little cry was heard. It was you. I was no longer tired. I was energized. You didn't like what was happening to you at all. I decided to take a peak. They had us behind a large curtain as they cut on your mother. They had you on a table in the corner of the room. Three people were around you so I could not see you. A nurse finally said, "Come over here, Daddy", I hopped right up and nearly sprinted over to where you were. The people moved aside and there you were. You were so beautiful. One look and I was hooked. You looked so much like me that it was uncanny. I was breathless. They wrapped you up in a tight little bundle and handed you to me. I took you without being nervous or anything. I had thought I would be frightened but I was not in the least. Just very very excited. I took you over to your mother and I shosed you to her and she began to sob. Then I took you from the operating room through some doors and on the other side of the door your Mamaw, Papaw, Aunt Lynn and Allison waited. They were looking in the wrong direction. They thought I'd be coming through a different door. They heard the door swing open beside them and they ran for you with nearly as much excitement as I had moments earlier. They snapped your picture. You jumped so bad when the flash went off. I took you into the nursery and they weighed and measured you and I went out to join everyone else. Your mother was being sewed up from her operation. We stood there and looked at you through the glass for the longest time. Eventually they said that your mother was in recovery and I could go see her. She wanted to see you so bad. She was high on pain killers but she still wanted to hold you. Eventually they brought you in for her to hold. She didn't get much time with you because everyone else followed right behind. Mamaw held you and Papaw held you and Allison held you and of course your mother and I held you. Eventually they took her away again for what was supposed to be four hours.
   I left your mom and went to Denny's for a bite to eat. As I sat in one of the booths waiting for my breakfast I dozed off. I ate and went home. I grabbed a few things and changed my clothes. I rushed back up to the hospital so I could be there when you returned at 1:30. I could have taken my time. They didn't bring you around until nearly four or so. Your mom was so impatient. That's a famous trait of your mother, impatience. But this time I couldn't blame her. I was just as impatient to see you as well. When they did bring you back we held you for hours. Mamaw, Papaw and Aunt Lynn came back around a little later that night. Everyone got to hold you and coo over you. You were such a good baby. You hardly cried at all. You just slept so soundly. Then you opened your eyes and started taking in the world. Your eyes followed Papaw. You were fascinated with Papaw. Almost as much as he was fascinated with you. Then we decided that we had better check your diaper. We took it off and you were clean. Your mom decided that she was gonna put a new one on you anyway. As soon as she had removed the diaper you began to poop everywhere. That seems to be your thing. You really like pooping when we have your diaper off. Why did you do that? It makes for such a mess. Anyway, you had four people around you watching you take that little dump on your receiving blanket. We cleaned you up and I was holding you and you lifted your head off of my chest which I thought was the neatest trick I had ever seen in my life.
   Anyway, a whole lot of stuff has gone on in the past few days. I haven't told you all about it. I'll post again and I'm sure your mother will as well, about things that went on at the hospital. I had better let you go because I want to get a little nap in and a shower before I head back up to the hospital to see you again. I love you so much, Rebecca.

Saturday, July 03, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                  You're Here! And you are beautiful. 7lbs. 4ozs. & 18½ inches long. Born on July 3rd, 2004 at 9:26 in the morning. And you are the most incredibly perfect creature I have ever laid eyes on.

Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello, my beautiful baby girl. I guess you got all the news that is news from your Daddy. I am so sorry that things had to work out this way; but maybe this is all in God's greater plan. I can't wait to hold you. Daddy and I are so looking forward to you being here with us that we can barely stand it. Daddy and I are so glad that God blessed you with us and we are so happy that you will be here with us soon. I was hoping for you to be here before the twelfth but I don't think that is going to happen unless I go into labor between now and then. Even if I go into labor, the doctor may very well give me a C-section anyway. There is a big chance of shoulder and hip dysplasia with babies born to diabetics from getting stuck in the birth canal. We don't want that!
   I hope that all is well with you; I can't wait to see you. You and Daddy mean more to me than anything in this world; we wanted you for so long. Daddy gave you all the important news, so I guess I don't really have much else to write other than I love you. I love you SO much. So does Daddy. We are waiting patiently for your impending arrival. We know that it will be the happiest day of our life.
Dear Rebecca,
                  Well, officially there's only 19 days until you are due. And today you are officially a term baby. So if you came tonight you wouldn't be a preemie. Your mother went to the doctor today and he said that if you didn't come soon he would schedule a c-section for around the twelfth. So I reckon that's your new unofficial due date.
   Well, this doesn't come as much of a shock to you, being as how you know where you live, but we have decided to sell the house. We've been mulling it over for quite awhile now but everything has come to a head and opportunities that we have to take have presented themselves to us so this is our final night in this house. I'm sorry you never got to see the room that your mother & I worked so hard on but I'm sure your next room will be just as nice. We decided that you deserve more than we could give you making an $1,100 a month house payment. I only clear $2,100 a month as it is. We are both sad to be leaving here but also very excited about a future with you in it.
   This is what has been bothering us both for so many months. I know that you have detected it in these writings. Now you know. We move tomorrow. This is our last night in the house that I have owned for almost a decade. Yeah, a little sad. The new place is so much nicer than this house. Kristie now has a dishwasher and tons of closet space. Our house was only 1,000 square feet and the new place is 1,300 square feet. The house had three bedrooms and the new place has two bedrooms so you can imagine how huge these rooms are.
   Well, your papaw is helping us move tomorrow and you know how he is. No half measures with that man. If it's gotta be done let's just do it now. No sense waiting a half minute. So I expect to be toatlly moved in by this time tomorrow night. We'll have a whole lot of work to do this weekend and I don't know when the phone will be transferred so I don't know when we'll get to put a blog post on the internet again. It might be a few days.
   I reckon I'll be seeing you sooner than later. I can't wait. You've been the only thing that has kept up my spirits these past few months and for that I am forever in your debt. I love you so much, Rebecca. I can't wait to see your chubby little face. And you are chubby; nine pounds at 37 weeks.

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Only 26 more days until you are due. Big happenings going on today. I will explain it all to you in a post script on the hard copy of your blog. I'm sure you know that this little journal was originally on the internet. Posted for the world to see. Your mom hasn't slept very well the last couple of nights. There's been so much stress on her lately. Not only from being pregnant but from other sources as well. I just wanted to check in with you today. I love you and can't wait to see you for the first time. See you soon.

I just noticed that your mom wanted me to post the cute little poem that she wrote for me from you for Father's Day. It was really cute.

If you never rope the moon for me
Or snag the stars in the sky
I'll still love you, unconditionally
You'll always be my favorite guy.

If you never serve me Venus or the world,
On bright, shiny, silver platters,
I'll still be Daddy's Little Girl,
And that's the only thing that matters.

Just give me all your love & devotion,
And all of your attention,
All of your best emotion,
And all your money, I forgot to mention!

I love you Daddy,
Love Rebecca

Monday, June 21, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello, baby. It's been a bit since I have posted and I wanted to let you know all about the baby shower they gave Daddy at his work. Some people really bought you some very nice things. You got all kinds of very nice clothes, things from Dillards and JC Penney and even some Tommy Hilfigger shirts. You got a really nice layette set, a crib pad and a sheet to match. There were some beautiful dresses and onesies and pants outfits, and a lady that works with Daddy knitted you a beautiful Afghan. She is also the same lady that made you your patch work teddy bear. I wonder if I will be able to put any of that stuff up for you or if you will drag it and gnaw it to pieces by the time you are three. Oh well, either way, do whatever you want to do with it. It is yours!
We looked all over the place for a white wicker basket for your laundry basket and could not find one ANYWHERE. But low and behold, today when Daddy went to work he got yet ANOTHER present for you, (he has been getting them all week long), and it was a WHITE WICKER BASKET. How lucky is that? A lady that works with Daddy made a beautiful cake for the baby shower. Daddy got to take some pictures. Maybe some day you can look back at them and see them. I will try to print as many as I can out and put them in an album for you.
   Well, Daddy is wanting me to have you so badly now. I keep telling him it is still a little too early but he is getting SO excited. I am glad, too. Daddy doesn't really get excited too much these days. I love your Daddy with all of my heart and I know that he will be a wonderful father to you. Well I just wanted to tell you some about Daddy's at-work baby shower. He really works with a bunch of wonderful people, for them to do this for you. Also, tonight when Daddy gets home I am going to have him post the poem I wrote for him from you & I for Father's Day. I love you, Rebecca!

Saturday, June 19, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                  Only 30 days until your due date. My family leave came through yesterday so we are good to go. I drove a forklift this week and it was rough, mainly because it's been years since I have done it. I had to search for things that the regular drivers already knew where they were at. I signed a bid on a regular material handler job yesterday. I don't know if I'm gonna get it or not. It would be another 35 cents and hour or so. Of course my regular job isn't all that bad. I'd be pleased either way. We had a huge scare this week. In addition to your mom's false labor. Maybe I'll tell you about it one day. There was a revival at church this week. We only went to last nights meeting. That job really kicked my tail. We're going again tonight.
   Your mother wrote another poem about you. She wrote it early this month. I don't know why she hasn't posted it yet. I think it's one of her better ones. Here it is. It's entitled "Tiny Pink Dresses"


Tiny pink dresses,
And tiny pink bows.
Pink ribbons in your tresses,
Tied up with a pretty pink rose.

Little white patent shoes.
With little white tights,
Trimmed in pinks and pastel blues,
Oh! What beautiful sights.

Watching you spin round & round,
As you throw your head back and smile,
Singing "London Bridge Is Falling Down"
Laughing, laughing, all the while.

I dream of you just this way,
Always playful and happy,
But I know that someday,
You'll turn into a woman before me.

But right now I have my dreams,
Of my precious little girl,
And after wanting it so long, it seems,
God has given me the world.

To Rebecca
Love Mommy
June 2, 2004


   Pretty good isn't it. Your mother has a gift. Your mamaw, Aunt Lynn and everyone is just so impressed with your mom's poetry. I'm sure you will be as well. Only I know you are going to be so much more talented in all things than your mother or I.....LOL. No pressure. Well, that's it for now. See you soon, little girl of mine. We both love you so very much and can not wait to hold you in our arms and to look upon your face.

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello my beautiful baby girl. Well, you gave us quite a scare last night. Daddy and I thought sure you were coming. Mommy was having some very painful contractions for almost three hours. They wound up being six to eight minutes apart at the end.. then they spaced out when we got to the hospital and the doctor and nurses got me resting on my side. They did not want you to come out just yet, because 35 weeks is too early. You need at least a couple more weeks to fluff up some. Then you will be as good as gold. I hope that you do come a little early, I just don't want you to come THIS early. Besides, Daddy doesn't even have his family leave yet. So fortunately it all just turned out to be a false alarm and they let me go at around two thirty this morning. Daddy went to work SO tired today. He is in bed resting now.
   So I suppose that was mine and Daddy's practice run. We love you so much and we are SO excited to see you. We just want you to hang in there long enough to be PERFECTLY healthy. We love you and we only want the best for you. Well, I know we will be seeing you soon. I love you, Rebecca.

Monday, June 14, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello sweetie. Well, it's not long until you will be here with us now. At the ultrasound the other day in the doctor's office, they said that you already weighed six pounds and two ounces. There are full term babies that are born smaller than that. At least I know you will be big enough to be healthy. I am so excited to see you. I know Daddy is too. He has got the new Daddy blues and he is nervous but I know that once you are here he will not have time to worry about anything but staring at and caring for you.
   I had to reschedule my appointment with the doctor for this week. Right now Mommy doesn't drive and it's difficult getting an appointment when other people like Mamaw and Aunt Lynn can take me. I got it rescheduled for 2:50 on Wednesday. I hope that someone can get me there. They were doing the appointments on Thursday and Dr. Youkilis is only there for half a day on Thursday. So all they could give me then were morning appointments. I really can't do morning appointments. People have kids and have to work. Well, hopefully I will get everything with my driving situation straightened out really soon. I am going to call the lawyer back and see if he has heard anything.
   I am wondering now more and more what you will look like. I cannot wait to see your beautiful face, and hold your tiny hands. I am so glad that God blessed me and Daddy with such a wonderful gift. You will never know the level of love we already feel for you... and it only gets stronger. I pray every night that you will be healthy and happy every day for the rest of your life. I know that Daddy and I our going to do our best to make sure that you are. '
   Aunt Mary said she caught Papaw Lawrence looking through a rack of baby clothes at Wal Mart the other day. When she asked him if he wanted to get you something he said he didn't know what to get... I think it is very cute. He is very excited about you too. You are his very first grand daughter. He has Dylan as a grandson but he never got to meet him. Papaw Lawrence will get to know you and I know that he will love you. You are a very lucky little girl to be so loved.
Well I am going to fiddle about today because I don't have that much energy left in me anymore. Daddy is right, you are wearing me out more and more these days. I can't wait until you are here, because I know you will wear me out even more. And I know it will be worth every minute of it. I love you, Rebecca.

Sunday, June 13, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     It's only 36 days until you are due. Everyone is in agreement with us that you will not wait 36 more days though. I just hope that you can wait for my family leave to come through. I am so nervous about your birth. I know you will be perfect and we seem to be well prepared for your arrival but still to know that the actual event is so very close is terrifying to me. I am anxious to see you and want it to be as soon as possible but still kinda weirded out by it all. Nothing this momentous has ever happened to me before.
   It's a lazy Sunday afternoon here now. Your mother is taking a nap. You are tiring her out so easily these days. I just added your 32 week ultrasound to the blog page. I probably should mow the yard but it's so hot outside. I'll probably wait until tomorrow to do it. Your papaw helped us take a whole lot of the clutter that was in the office to the recycling center Saturday afternoon. While it's still a wreck it does look so much better.
   Well, I'm gonna let you go for now. See you soon, Rebecca. We both love you very much.

Thursday, June 10, 2004

Dear Rebecca,
                     Hello Rebecca. There's only 39 days left until your due date. Your mother & I do not think you will wait until then. You have always been a big baby. Your mother has gestational diabetes so you have been running large. At the ultrasound today it was determined that you weigh approximately 6 pound and 2 ounces. You are doing great. We have another great ultrasound picture of you. Maybe I will put it up here on the blog this weekend. I am kinda tired today though. We have been super busy getting ready for you. Your room is nearly complete. Your mom wants a rug that matches the decor and your papaw is gonna make us some blue gingham curtains when we get the fabric. Papaw used to be a sewing machine mechanic so that's how he knows how to sew. As you know already we have your crib and other furniture. We put up some shelves, your mother made some very cute pictures here on the computer and we framed them and hung them on your wall, we hung your plush moon & stars from the ceiling and we stenciled your name above your crib. The stenciling was hard. I was afraid we had screwed up your wall but it actually came out quite nice. We are going to try to get all the cardboard taken to the recycling center this weekend. Your room is nearly perfect but the rest of the house is a total wreck.
   Well, little girl, I am tired. I just wanted to check in with you today and let you know how things are going with us as we wait on you. I'm gonna surf around on the internet for a little while and then I am gonna watch some television with your mother before I have to go to bed. See you soon, Rebecca. We both love you very much